“Has he ever trapped you in a room and not let you out?
Has he ever raised a fist as if he were going to hit you?
Has he ever thrown an object that hit you or nearly did?
Has he ever held you down or grabbed you to restrain you?
Has he ever shoved, poked, or grabbed you?
Has he ever threatened to hurt you?
If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then we can stop wondering whether he’ll ever be violent; he already has been.”
– Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
- 0.3% of women in South Africa reported gender-based violence to the police.
- Four women are killed by their partners in South Africa every day.
- The second most common cause of these deaths occurs when women decide to end their relationships.
- Sexual offences against women increased from 31 665 in 2015/16 to 70 813 in 2016/17.
- Sex without consent in marriage is also considered as rape.
- Domestic violence has the most repeat victims of any other crime in that a victim suffers 35 assaults on average before reporting it to the police the first time.
- South Africa’s female homicide rate is 6 times above the global average.
- South Africa has recently been named as having the highest level of adult per capita alcohol
consumption in Africa. This contributes to increased levels of both Gender Based Violence and HIV
infection, alcohol abuse often leads to violence against women, risky sexual behaviours such as
inconsistent condom use, coercive sex or rape and multiple sexual partners.
- South Africa has an estimated 6,800,000 people living with HIV, making it one of the countries with the highest rates of infection in the world.
- Over 41% of rapes reported in South Africa involve children under age 18.
What is Gender-based violence?
Gender-based violence is a systemic pattern of controlling, coercing and violent behaviour intended to punish, abuse and ultimately control the thoughts, beliefs and actions of another. It is about power and control. It includes emotional, physical, verbal, sexual and financial abuse. It encompasses intimate partner violence, child abuse, elder abuse and violence between siblings.
If you’re afraid of your partner, that’s a big red flag.
Forms of abuse
Physical abuse is defined as any deliberate act, behavior or physical force by an individual or individuals against someone which causes them bodily harm, injury, trauma or puts their life in danger like kicking, punching, burning and the use of a knife or gun to cause bodily harm.
Physical abuse can and in most cases does, play a role in the cycle of domestic abuse and more often than not goes hand in hand with controlling behavior, emotional and verbal abuse and other forms of violence like stalking, sexual assault and murder.
Signs that someone is being physically abused could be:
- Wearing clothes that don’t fit the season, like long sleeves in summer to cover bruises
- Excuses for injuries
- Black eyes
- Busted lips
- Red or purple marks on the neck
- Sprained wrists
- Bruises on the arms
Emotional abuse includes any behavior that is used to control, demean, harm or punish a woman.
Many people think that emotional abuse is not as serious or harmful as physical abuse. Women state that this is not true, and that the biggest problem they often face is getting others to take emotional abuse seriously. The presence of emotional abuse is the largest risk factor and greatest predictor of physical violence. Emotional abuse is responsible for long-term problems with health, self-esteem, depression, and anxiety in women.
The end result is the same as for physical abuse – a woman is fearful of her partner and changes her behaviour to please him or be safe from harm.
- Isolate a woman from her friends, family, cultural or faith community, care providers, and prevent her from having independent activities such as work, English as a Second Language classes or other education
- Act overly jealous or possessive; accuse a woman of having affairs if she talks to another man; coerce her into sexual activity to prove her love
- Criticize a woman constantly – her actions, size and appearance, and abilities
- Use a woman’s disability or deafness to demean or control her
- Threaten, intimidate, harass, or punish a woman if she does not comply with her abusive partner’s demands
- Use the children to control a woman, for example undermine her authority as a parent or threaten to take them if she should leave
- Make all of the decisions in the family, withhold information and refuse to consult her or about important matters such as where they live, or the family’s finances
- Control the money – what is spent, how it is spent, not allow a woman access to financial resources, or conversely not contribute to any of the household expenses.
Sexual abuse includes rape, unwanted sexual contact, and verbal sexual harassment. It includes intimate-partner violence, sexual assault, forced prostitution, exploitation, human trafficking, sexual exploitation, infanticide, and neglect. Sex without consent in marriage is also considered as rape.
Economic abuse is the unreasonable deprivation of economic or financial resources to which a person is entitled under law, or which the complainant requires to pay for basic household necessities, mortgage bond repayments or payment of rent in respect of a shared residence. It also covers the unreasonable disposal of household effects or other property.
Money is controlled by your partner for example:
- Keeps cash and credit cards from you
- Puts you on an allowance and makes you explain every cent you spend
- Keeps you from working whatever job you want
- Steals money from you or your friends
- Won’t let you have money for basic needs like food and clothes
A questionnaire to help you decide whether you are exposed to gender based violence.
Are you in an abusive situation?
This questionnaire is designed to help you decide if you’re living in an abusive situation. There are different forms of abuse, and not every victim of abuse experiences all of them. Below are questions about your relationship with your partner. Each answer or response has points assigned.
Never 0 points
Rarely 1 point
Sometimes 2 points
Frequently 3 points
Answer each question with the response that best describes your relationship and write the number of points in the margin. By totaling all of the points you can compare your score with the Abuser Index at the end of the document.
____ 1. Does your partner continually monitor your time and make you account for every minute?
____ 2. Does your partner ever accuse you of having affairs with others or act suspicious that you are?
____ 3. Is your partner ever rude to your friends?
____ 4. Do you ever feel discouraged from starting same-sex friendships?
____ 5. Do you feel isolated and alone, as if there were nobody close for you to confide in?
____ 6. Is your partner overly critical of daily things, such as, your cooking, your clothes, or your appearance?
____ 7. Does your partner demand a strict account of how you spend money?
____ 8. Do your partner’s moods change radically, from very calm to very angry and vice versa?
____ 9. Is your partner disturbed by you working, or the thought of you working?
____ 10. Does your partner become angry more easily if he/she drinks?
____ 11. Does your partner pressure you for sex more often than you’d like?
____ 12. Does your partner become angry if you don’t want to go along with his/her request for sex?
____ 13. Do you quarrel much over financial matters?
____ 14. Do you quarrel much about having children or raising them?
____ 15. Does your partner ever strike you with his/her hands or feet (slap, punch, kick, etc.)?
____ 16. Does your partner ever strike you with an object?
____ 17. Does your partner ever threaten you with an object or weapon?
____ 18. Has your partner ever threatened to kill either him/herself or you?
____ 19. Does your partner ever give you visible injuries (welts, bruises, cuts)?
____ 20. Have you ever had to treat any injuries from your partner’s violence with first aid?
____ 21. Have you ever had to seek professional aid for any injury at a clinic, emergency room, or doctor’s office?
____ 22. Does your partner ever hurt you sexually or make you have intercourse against your will?
____ 23. Is your partner ever violent towards the children?
____ 24. Is your partner ever violent toward other people outside your home and family?
____ 25. Does your partner ever throw objects or break things when he/she is angry?
____ 26. Has your partner ever been in trouble with the police?
____ 27. Have you ever called the police or tried to call them because you felt you or other members of your family were in danger?
To score your response simply add up the points for each question. The sum is your Abuse Index Score. To get some idea of how your relationship is, compare your score with the following chart:
81-64 Dangerously Abusive
63-26 Seriously Abusive
25-11 Moderately Abusive
A woman with a score of 11-25 range, however, does live in a home where she experiences some violence at least once in a while. It may be that this is a relationship where violence is just beginning. In a new relationship there is good reason to expect it will eventually escalate into more serious forms and may occur more frequently.
Women with scores in the 26-63 range are in a seriously abusive relationship that can, under outside pressure, or with the sudden strain of a family emergency, move into the dangerously severe range. Serious injury is quite probable if it has not already occurred. A woman here needs to consider finding counseling. She should seriously consider getting help, even leaving.
Women with scores in the top range 64-81 need to consider even more seriously the option of leaving at least temporarily while she considers her next move. The violence will not take care of itself or miraculously disappear. Over time the chances are very good that the woman’s life will be in danger.
Gender based violence & Human rights in South Africa
It was not until the introduction of the Bill of Rights that all women in this country received formal recognition as equal citizens. South African women -under the social and even legal control of their fathers or husbands – were second-class citizens for many years.
South Africa’s common law deprived white women of guardianship and various economic rights. Black women were obviously doubly disadvantaged as a result of their race and their gender. Customary law, for instance, gives black women the status of minors and excludes them from rights regarding children and property.
Our Constitution and laws give women many rights. Most importantly, the Bill of Rights gives all women the right to equality.
In short the Equality Clause says that no person may be discriminated against on a number of grounds, including things like their sex and gender.
Equality between men and women is one of the most important aims of the Constitution.
Women are obviously protected by the full range of rights guaranteed in the new Constitution – the rights to life, dignity, privacy and others. But they receive specific protection in section 9, entitled “Equality”.
“(3) The state may not unfairly discriminate directly or indirectly against anyone on one or more grounds, including race, gender, sex, pregnancy, marital status, ethnic or social origin, colour, sexual orientation, age, disability, religion, conscience, belief, culture, language and birth.” The prohibition of discrimination on the grounds of gender, sex, pregnancy and marital status is clearly intended to protect women. The grounds “sex”, which is a biological feature, and “gender”, a social artefact, are both included – perhaps unnecessarily. But the result is that this section leaves no doubt that no unfair discrimination based on any feature of being a woman will be tolerated.
What is the 16 days of activism?
It is a worldwide campaign to oppose violence against women and children. It aims to raise awareness of the negative impact that violence and abuse have on women and children and to rid society of abuse permanently.
When does the campaign take place?
The 16 Days of Activism Campaign is held from 25 November to 10 December every year
However, the success of this campaign rests on our daily individual and collective actions to safeguard our society against this cycle of abuse.
Do you know that Parliament has passed laws to protect the rights of individuals against abuse?
The Domestic Violence Act of 1998
The Children’s Act of 2005
The Maintenance Act of 1998
The Promotion of Equity and Prevention of Unfair Discrimination Act of 2000
The Criminal Law (Sexual Offences and Related Matters Act) Amendment Act of 2007
The Domestic Violence Act No 116 of 1998.
The main purpose of the Act is to provide the highest form of protection from domestic violence. The law places responsibility on state organs and in particular the police to ensure that survivors of domestic violence are able to apply for protection orders to prevent abusers from entering a mutual home or the survivors home or place of work. The order can also allow for the seizure of weapons The DVA has an expansive definition of domestic violence that include physical, sexual, emotional, verbal, psychological and economic abuse as well as intimidation, harassment, stalking and controlling behaviors. It also recognizes a range of familiar and domestic relationships, including same sex relationships.
Gaps and Challenges:
One of the major challenges hindering the effective implementation of this Act is that when it was developed, it was not costed. Further whilst it is acknowledged that addressing gender based violence requires a multi-disciplinary approach the Act does not place obligations on the Department of Social Development in the provision of care and support services and neither the Department of Health or National prosecution authority.
In a 2012 Tshwaranang Study focused on reviewing the implementation of the Domestic Violence Act; found that a substantial percentage of police officers had limited knowledge of the provisions of this Act more specifically relating to their responsibilities. In addition to this the study found that both lack of human and financial resources impacted on the ineffective implementation of this Act coupled with the notion that most officers did not view domestic violence as a crime but more of private family matter. According to Vetten (2012), domestic violence matters are classified as social crimes in the SAPS and the lack of clarity on what social crimes are compounds the problem of not viewing this act as serious matter.
Does domestic violence have an effect on children?
It not only has a devastating effect physical and emotional affects on victims, but also have an impact on those around you. Children learn how to interact from a young age and being exposed to domestic violence can lead a child to be an abusive violent adult. Children are abused in more than 46% of homes in which domestic violence occurs.
In which type of family or relationship does gender-based violence occur?
- Persons of any class, culture, religion, sexual orientation, marital status, age, and sex can be victims or perpetrators of Gender-based violence.
- Alcohol use, drug use, and stress do not cause gender-based violence; they may go along with gender-based violence, but they do not cause the violence.
- Generally, Gender-based violence happens when an abuser has learned and chooses to abuse.
- Gender-based violence is rarely caused by mental illness, but it is often used as an excuse for domestic violence.
- Note: Men are the victims of gender-based violence in 40% of cases.
Is it easy to spot an abuser?
Abusers are not easy to spot. There is no ‘typical’ abuser. In public, they may appear friendly and loving to their partner and family. They often only abuse behind closed doors. They also try to hide the abuse by causing injuries that can be hidden and do not need a doctor.
Abusers often have low self-esteem. They do not take responsibility for their actions. They may even blame the victim for causing the violence. In most cases, men abuse female victims. It is important to remember that women can also be abusers and men can be victims.
What are the effects of domestic violence?
Physical injury, depression, anxiety, sleeplessness, low self-esteem, anger, hitting, biting, withdrawal.
Women often cannot insist on fidelity, demand condom use, or refuse sex to their partner, even when they suspect or know he is already infected himself. And they often lack the economic power to remove themselves from relationships that carry major risks of HIV infection. . . . Women, fearful of getting beaten or thrown out, are unlikely to ask their boyfriends to wear a condom, or question them about fidelity
There are a variety of ways that gender-based violence may put victims at risk of contracting HIV/AIDS; ways in which abusers use their own or the victim’s HIV+ status as a weapon of coercion; and additional obstacles to health and safety that exist for HIV+ people who are also victims of domestic violence.
How Gender-based Violence Puts Victims at Risk of Contracting HIV
- Victims are often unable to negotiate the use of safer sex practices with coercive partners.
- Abusers may rape or sexually assault their victims as part of their pattern of control, making it unlikely that the abuser will use a condom. In fact, some abusers may intentionally infect their partners with HIV in an attempt to keep the victim from leaving.
- Abusive partners who engage in sexual activity outside the relationship, potentially expose victims to STD’s including HIV.
- Abusive partners may force victims to engage in sexual activities with others.
- Victims of gender-based violence often suffer a wide range of health-related problems caused or exacerbated by the abuse. This negative effect on their health may compromise their immune system in ways that increase their risk of HIV.
- Abusers may prevent victims from receiving medical care which may, in turn, negatively impact their health and increase their risk of contracting HIV.
There is no crime termed ”domestic violence”. Measuring the extent of domestic violence therefore requires paying attention to different sorts of familial and intimate relationships, as well as different types of abuse. Police data does not offer a comprehensive guide to this terrain. Cases of domestic violence are likely to be recorded as cases of assault. Given the serious nature of domestic violence, it is important that assault victims are encouraged to report incidents to the police.
The police do not release the details about the number of assaults that involve intimate partners although they are required by law to record cases of domestic violence in a register at police stations and have victim friendly rooms available. Despite these requirements, regular compliance is very low:
The Civilian Secretariat for Police found that between October 2013 and March 2014, only 1.4% of police stations inspected (two out of 145) were fully compliant with the Domestic Violence Act.
77% were partially compliant and 21% were rated as non-complaint.
This means that the police are not adhering to their own policies in relation to recording domestic violence and therefore do not have an accurate picture of the extent of the problem facing the country.
The SAPS six-point plan to assist victims of gender-based violence
- All victims should be treated with respect and dignity and interviewed by a trained police official in a victim sensitive manner.
- Victims should be assisted in a victim friendly or alternative room, where a statement will be taken in private providing victim support services.
- Victims will be referred/taken for medical examination by the healthcare professional to obtain medical evidence and complete a medical report, including seeing to the health of the victim.
- The investigation should be conducted by the Family Violence, Child Protection and Sexual Offences Investigation Unit or a detective with relevant training.
- Victims of sexual offences, femicide and infanticide and their families should be referred to victim support services that are available within the precinct for legal, medical, social and psychological help.
- Victims should be proactively and continuously given feedback on the progress of their cases.
Gender-based violence helpline: 0800 150 150
Gender-based violence command centre: *120*7867#
International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women
Women’s right to live free from violence is upheld by international agreements such as the Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination against Women (CEDAW), especially through General Recommendations 12 and 19, and the 1993 UN Declaration on the Elimination of Violence against Women.
UN Women partner with Governments, UN agencies, civil society organizations and other institutions to advocate for ending violence, increase awareness of the causes and consequences of violence and build capacity of partners to prevent and respond to violence.
They also promote the need for changing norms and behaviour of men and boys, and advocate for gender equality and women’s rights.
UN Women supports expanding access to quality multi-sectoral responses for survivors covering safety, shelter, health, justice and other essential services.